Still Ashes

animalstalkinginallcaps:

HEY PAUL. HOW’S IT HANGING?

PRETTY GOOD, PETE. YOURSELF?

NOT GONNA LIE TO YOU, OLD BUDDY. I’M ABOUT ONE MORE 60 HOUR WEEK FROM NIBBLING ON A SHOTGUN, AND I WANT TO GET DRUNK ABOUT IT.

WELL, I’VE GOT OVER 60 DIFFERENT TYPES OF BOURBON BACK HERE, PETE. YOU’RE WELCOME TO TRY THEM ALL. I HAVE YET TO MEET A PROBLEM WHISKEY CAN’T SOLVE.

YOUR EX-WIFE AGREE WITH THAT OUTLOOK?

YOU MEAN MY EX-PROBLEM, THAT’S NOW SOLVED?

YOU’RE A GOOD BARTENDER, PAUL. IT’S NOT JUST ABOUT POURING DRINKS. THERE’S A PHILOSOPHICAL ASPECT, PLUS A GOOD DEGREE OF COMMUNICATION SKILLS.

YOU WANT TO COMMUNICATE WITH A COUPLE OUNCES OF BASIL HAYDEN’S?

SEE? THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT.